sorry about the no-updating

haha yea, i'm writing a post about not-posting. really lame.

well, I guess i can try to explain my lack of verbatim here. When i'm stressed, i have a ton of thoughts in my head but i can't formulate them into a nice piece of writing. if people are going to take their time to read it i dont want to waste their time.

but i've been stressed as hell. It kinda feels like how i felt in hawaii. Everyday i spend 9+ hrs at work because i just started and i have no experience and i feel like an idiot in every single way.and i'm lonely because i have to take my lunch breaks alone most of the time because other people are too busy and important that i dont get to take lunch with them. well, that and the company is a bit on the asocial side. and i havne't been introduced to that many people aside from my bosses. They are too higher up for me to have a real conversation with them. And plus i actually have to get quizzed by them about the mountains of reading i have to do so i feel anything but comfortable at the sight of them.

so everyday after i spend all my time in the cubicle, i go home and shower, and eat, and sleep (or read some more) and it's another day.

that's why i really can't update much until the weekend. too many things are on my plate and i can't think straight.