am i ready for IT?

so i was mentioning about Match.com the other day to a friend of mine..joking about how i'm going to sign up RIGHT THIS YEAR (out of frustration of course).

And so yesterday i tried to start a free profile, and yet i couldn't finish it. the same ideas kept running through my head: am i ready to commit to this online dating stuff?

I mean it's worked before, for a lot of people, so why am i so hesitant about taking this big step (and is it a big step at all)? i mean the lifestyle i'm leading does look like it can use a little online dating services, i'm either at school or at work, surrounded by 90% females, and when i go out i hardly meet anyone who's eligible and who i'd like to know better. maybe Match isn't such a bad idea, since you can come across someone who has similar interests who you just never cross paths with. Very rational.

But why can't i finish writing my profile? what is holding me back? there's some time left but not THAT much time left. i should already want to do this thing to increase my chances, what's the worst that can happen?

well, i guess to me it means a lot more than just casually meeting people. It also means the end of my hopeful phase that something might happen natually without human force intervened. I kept hoping that one day, by some weird occurence, i would bump into/pick up the same merchandise/flirt shamelessly with a stranger who will eventually become my significant other, and make a good wedding story out of it. I am just not sure if saying "we met on matchher/eharmony/yahoo personal" will do it for me. of course it can be romantic, i mean out of millions of users online we click with each other, that IS kind of romantic. but like i said, i tend to like to think that internet is reserved for those who really just sit at home hoping that someone online will become his/her soulmate all the while disengage him/herself from the real world. but i guess i'm becomgin the butt of my own joke this time.

same reason why i preferred not to be set up.