After thoughts about the fellowship

Things have been well. I guess since i found out about the fellowship offer things have been going in a generally positive direction. Other than the craziness I must deal with in terms of making the cross country move, I have felt a big weight being lifted off my shoulder.

Last weekend I had awesome dinner at a school banquet. It was held at a Mediterranean restaurant called Cafe Santorini. We took over one of the banquet halls and each got our sash. What a enjoyable moment! I especially love (out of vanity) when the "where are they going" slide came up, the moment where they announced how I will be a future fellow at Bristol Myers Squibb. I had only told a few close friends, so many people were surprised when they heard the announcement. Like I said before, I never even thought this could happen, and I am VERY GLAD that at the end of all this, I was able to land SOMETHING. and that something happens to be something I wanted very much which was at the top of my list. I may not have written about this before in my blog but I later found out where the other people are going. And I must say that I personally feel that I got the best end of the deal. I didn't want any two-year committment, especially in areas like regulatory affairs or medical information, which can be very dry when it only deals with one little aspect of pharmaceutical industry. So the fact that I am in the arena of Diabetes/Cardiovascular is already exciting enough, AND i get to oversee the newest clinical studies and make strategies. I hope this doesn't come out in a self-fulfilling tone, but I have always been disgusted with some people in our class who choose to market themselves by being exclusive, being cliquey, being brown-nosers...and I wanted to do none of that. I had forced myself to be involved with this organization on campus where like-minded people get together about wanting to pursue a life in industry, and i was so sick of it after two years. I quit after one year of serving on the board. People in it made fun of people and gossiped about each other during Board Dinner. And they only consider you 'useful' when you have something they want. I have always considered myself a social person (on the outside) but I just couldtn' deal with them anymore I didn't even attend the end-of-the year banquet (which was a big NO-NO). I couldn't spend another minute sitting at a table feeling like I wish I could be somewhere else. Hence I am glad that through it all, i am able to land a position that will likely make them fall off the chair upon hearing it. I just want to prove a point, that you dont have compromise who you are in order to get to where you want to be.

All happy thoughts aside, This of course is a very early point of my career to say that I've accomplished it all. Right now I will be working primarily in the cardiovascular/diabetes market. Although a HUGE market, this is not really where my passion lies. I had wanted to do branch into oncology because that seems to be the hot topic right now, but after 2 rotations at a cancer hospital I can't say I am in love with it. A part of me is still very resistant and disliking the complete unpredictability of chemo drugs. Rather, after 4 weeks into my current rotation, I am finding my passion in psychiatry back. Lots of interesting patient cases and lots of miracles can be done with antipsychotics/mood stabilizers/antidepressants. I'm not a total believer that everyone needs to be on something, there's lots that can be done with cognitive behavioral therapy/counseling. but i HAVE seen it work wonders in the most bizarre cases, which is the reason why psychiatry is so interesting. I sincerely hope, that one day, wherever life leads me, I can pursue it further whether that means going back to the research of psychotropics and just give pharmacy a rest. :)

That's is for now. So the much-delayed announcement on my blog is that, I am joining Bristol-Myers Squibb as a 1-year fellow in CV/Metabolic's Scientific Communication and Medical Strategy department. :) Yeah it's a mouthful....

And I will miss home a lot.